Robert writes home #104 15 Nov 1997 "(Reflections of a budding seminary teacher.")
15 Nov 1997
Dear Mother,
I hope you'er doing well. I talked with Jeanene today and she said that she had visited you acouple of weeks ago.
We've been having a car crisis lately. Heidi Jo has been stranded twice in the last 12 days. First my Lincoln caught fire while she was coming home from the temple on the freeway, twelve days ago. Then today she took Sam to Fresno and my BMW broke down about 7 miles from home on the way back. We're down to the Toyota pick up and a loaner we're using while the Lincoln is getting fixed. Fortunately, someone with a cell phone stopped and let her call for help on both occasions.
We had a good series of rain storms this past week ending our long dry period. The crops are about all harvested so it's good.
Sam is giving a talk in our sesquicentennial fireside tomorrow night. I'm enclosing a copy of it for you to read.
I'm enjoying my seminary teaching experience. It's exciting, but my experience teaching seminary has caused me to draw the following conclusions (which I realize may not be the same as a better teacher might have.)
The social structure and climate makes a big difference relative to teaching success. In my seminary class, the students are working with priorities that I don't always consider. Things like, I imagine the students are thinking to themselves, "I wonder what the other students think of me. If I answer the teacher's question will the "smart mouths" make fun of me and belittle me for trying to seek any advantage in his favor. I can't stand it when I get belittled in front of other kids my age. I don't think I'll risk it. I'll just be quiet and keep my thoughts to myself and not draw any attention."
The talkative students, the ones who can't keep quiet, try to answer in words that sound like they have the upper hand in the conversation..with snide, sarcastic, retorts and "put downs."
The "macho" boys feel a desperate need to not lose "face" (pre-eminent male position) or come out "second best"...looking like they got bested in the exchange.)Their safest path is to act disinterested and sleep through it all.
Hardly anyone seems to have any concern for whether or not the teacher gets his, or her, feelings hurt by the way they respond to the presentation. I can relate to that. I had a history teacher in the 10th grade, whose class, I found difficult to bear. It never occurred to me that I could be causing her any hurt by the way I acted in her class. She had that intense, hostile look in her eye and I thought that she was made of steel and that her feelings were impenetrable. Now I think she was suffering a self esteem crisis. That look was probably the look of a "cornered animal ready to lash out at her attackers," being threatened with the destruction of her self confidence.
Nor do the students want the esteem of the teacher nearly as much as they do the esteem of their peers. You can try to flatter them and praise them, and they won't register much appreciation. In front of their peers, the praise poses a threat rather than an enhancement. It's something else for the peer group to resent and punish with verbal abuse.
So, an effective teacher, has to be willing to preserve without much positive feedback. And what feedback you get has to be read between the lines, so to speak. But the chance to have input on their minds on a daily basis is great and kind of like raising your own kids. If you can just keep yourself confidence through it all, and not be intimidated into a quivering, tongue-tied, blubbering incompetent...which happens to me every once in awhile.
Love, Robert, Janet, Heidi Jo and Sam.
Dear Mother,
I hope you'er doing well. I talked with Jeanene today and she said that she had visited you acouple of weeks ago.
We've been having a car crisis lately. Heidi Jo has been stranded twice in the last 12 days. First my Lincoln caught fire while she was coming home from the temple on the freeway, twelve days ago. Then today she took Sam to Fresno and my BMW broke down about 7 miles from home on the way back. We're down to the Toyota pick up and a loaner we're using while the Lincoln is getting fixed. Fortunately, someone with a cell phone stopped and let her call for help on both occasions.
We had a good series of rain storms this past week ending our long dry period. The crops are about all harvested so it's good.
Sam is giving a talk in our sesquicentennial fireside tomorrow night. I'm enclosing a copy of it for you to read.
I'm enjoying my seminary teaching experience. It's exciting, but my experience teaching seminary has caused me to draw the following conclusions (which I realize may not be the same as a better teacher might have.)
The social structure and climate makes a big difference relative to teaching success. In my seminary class, the students are working with priorities that I don't always consider. Things like, I imagine the students are thinking to themselves, "I wonder what the other students think of me. If I answer the teacher's question will the "smart mouths" make fun of me and belittle me for trying to seek any advantage in his favor. I can't stand it when I get belittled in front of other kids my age. I don't think I'll risk it. I'll just be quiet and keep my thoughts to myself and not draw any attention."
The talkative students, the ones who can't keep quiet, try to answer in words that sound like they have the upper hand in the conversation..with snide, sarcastic, retorts and "put downs."
The "macho" boys feel a desperate need to not lose "face" (pre-eminent male position) or come out "second best"...looking like they got bested in the exchange.)Their safest path is to act disinterested and sleep through it all.
Hardly anyone seems to have any concern for whether or not the teacher gets his, or her, feelings hurt by the way they respond to the presentation. I can relate to that. I had a history teacher in the 10th grade, whose class, I found difficult to bear. It never occurred to me that I could be causing her any hurt by the way I acted in her class. She had that intense, hostile look in her eye and I thought that she was made of steel and that her feelings were impenetrable. Now I think she was suffering a self esteem crisis. That look was probably the look of a "cornered animal ready to lash out at her attackers," being threatened with the destruction of her self confidence.
Nor do the students want the esteem of the teacher nearly as much as they do the esteem of their peers. You can try to flatter them and praise them, and they won't register much appreciation. In front of their peers, the praise poses a threat rather than an enhancement. It's something else for the peer group to resent and punish with verbal abuse.
So, an effective teacher, has to be willing to preserve without much positive feedback. And what feedback you get has to be read between the lines, so to speak. But the chance to have input on their minds on a daily basis is great and kind of like raising your own kids. If you can just keep yourself confidence through it all, and not be intimidated into a quivering, tongue-tied, blubbering incompetent...which happens to me every once in awhile.
Love, Robert, Janet, Heidi Jo and Sam.
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